Using Fashion As Self Care

For as long as I can remember, I’ve used clothing to express my personality, emotions and even health! At university, my basilar type migraine was particularly troublesome, with me losing consciousness multiple times a day. On days I was feeling particularly rough, I’d dress in a pair of skinny jeans, brown knee high heeled boots and a hoodie. The boots made me feel like I was still kicking ass, despite how ill I felt. The hoodie was the little bit of snuggly comfort I needed to get through lectures. Like curling up in a blanket, only socially acceptable. Damn, I wish I’d taken a blanket to lectures. Who else wishes their younger self didn’t care about peer approval?! Without realising it, I was using fashion as self care.

This post is sponsored by very.co.uk. All products marked with * have been gifted to me for consideration. More information can be found in my full disclaimer.

When I became a Mum, my outfit choices revolved around which woven wrap (sling) we would be using that day. I wore a LOT of plain combinations, as the majority of woven wraps available are patterned. I know lots of people love complimenting/clashing patterns and colours of clothes with their slings. But, my photosensitivity and visual processing disorder make this difficult for me.

I pretty much had a ‘Mum uniform’, which consisted of a plain top (usually black or white) and a denim skirt. I’d add black leggings for the colder months. This combination of ‘Mum uniform’ and woven wraps worked well when Elise was a baby. My wraps were like an accessory that added a touch of beauty to my basic wardrobe choice. As Elise started to walk more and more, this basic outfit formula which allowed my wraps to shine, just looked boring on their own.

Feeling very uninspired by my outfit choices over the summer, I decided it was about time I inject a little joy into my wardrobe. Don’t get me wrong, basic, comfort driven outfits have served me well over the past few months of pandemic life. But, with nights drawing in and no end in sight for the ‘new normal’ I felt it was time I made an effort to regain my sense of style and use fashion as self care. Don’t worry – I’m not throwing comfort out of the window. It’s still a high priority for all my outfits! Comfort is key when living with chronic illnesses.

Ever since I became ill at the age of 11, I’ve found autumn and winter hard. The increase in artificial lighting heightens my basilar type and hemiplegic migraine. The cold increases my hEDS joint pain and stormy weather affects both my migraine and my PoTS. On top of all this, autumn and winter have been times of trauma – in pregnancy and postnatally. I found last year very difficult with cPTSD, as a result.

Wow! That reads like I’m moaning. I’m not, it’s just that autumn and winter are hard and it’s important to acknowledge this – for myself and others who’s health is affected by the change in season.

With all the things my health throws at me, self care is particularly important during the colder months. Being the Mum of an energetic, active toddler means that self care needs to be quick and simple. Otherwise it ends up feeling like just one more thing on my never ending to-do list! And that’s the last thing I need.

Using fashion as self care is something I can do quickly and easily, to have a positive impact on my mental health. After all, it (generally) takes the same amount of energy to put on a pretty dress as it does an old, worn out jumper. I feel more composed and in control when I’m wearing something nice, so it makes sense to harness this. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll still be hibernating in my hoodie at times. Sometimes comfort and casual is the best way – like the day after my Botox injections (for chronic migraine)!

Speaking of which… Having not left the house in almost 3 weeks, I got all dressed up for my Botox injection appointment. I even put lipstick on, just for in the car journey! I noticed myself becoming anxious in the lead up to my appointment. Having had my injections postponed for 5 months because of COVID-19, I was nervous that it could be pushed back further. Choosing my outfit, lipstick and packing a bag of edible treats helped me minimise this discomfort.

I decided to wear this beautiful Monsoon Printed Short Jersey Dress* and grey Quiz Soft Knit 3 Button Cropped Cardigan* combination, with a pair of black leggings. I knew I needed layers for my appointment and travelling, as my temperature regulation isn’t great. When I get hot, my heart rate soars and I become dizzy quickly. Something I need to avoid this during my Botox treatment! Sometimes hospitals can be a little warm and I wanted to make sure I was comfortable during treatment. It turned out to be an ideal outfit for travelling too as the weather was warmer than anticipated. I spent much of the car journey with my cardigan off.

For colder days, I love wearing a plain long sleeve top underneath a dress. I find this a great option for transitioning outfits from summer to autumn and beyond. I love how this works with the Monsoon dress, showing off the neckline beautifully.

One of my aims with using fashion as self care, is to step out of my comfort zone. I’m done with basic, safe outfits. To help with this, I’ve been working on taking more notice of the outfits I see others wearing, particularly on Instagram. Thinking about what I like on others, how it might translate to my body type and if it work with my mobility aids. I love that as well as inspiring me, this is getting me to consume social media in a more mindful way.

I used to love using a patterned item as the basis of my outfit, then picking out one or two accent colours for the rest of my ensemble. So I tried to incorporate this in my outfit, by pairing the dress with these Converse Chuck Taylor All Star High-Tops*.

My sister (@chrissye9 on Instagram) has always been a source of style inspiration for me. She has a talent for taking a nice outfit and making it pop and her unique style shines through. I also love her confidence in the outfits she puts together, which I think is how she pulls them off so well. So I’m trying to emulate this!

Chrissy is a big fan of Converse. They were the shoe of choice for her bridesmaids (I was one), in a lovely mint shade. I had this in mind when I chose the yellow high tops to go with this Monsoon printed dress. While the pop of yellow from the Converse isn’t too far out of my (current) comfort zone, combining it with a dress is. I have to admit that I wore black boots to my appointment. I knew this wasn’t the time to be pushing out of my comfort zone – baby steps!

Does anyone else find it easier to do things that are out of your comfort zone when you blend in with others?! I felt confident with the dress/Converse combination as a bridesmaid, because I was one of of 6!

Dungarees are another item of clothing that I see on others and think ‘wow!’ but then don’t feel that I can pull off.

One of my favourite autumn colours is burgundy. So when I saw these Joe Browns Cord Dungarees* I decided it was time to embrace my awkwardness with dungarees and use my fashion as self care ethos to add them to my wardrobe. After all, it’s not like I’m going anywhere at the moment. So if it doesn’t quite work as I hoped, no one is going to see me!

I have to admit that I wasn’t convinced when these dungarees arrived. The cut didn’t feel quite right and I wasn’t sure they were flattering when sitting down. But Dan (hubby) loves them on me! So I think it’s just that I need to get used to them. I’m wearing them as I type and already feeling more confident.

I love how these dungarees are high waisted, with the side buttons going all the way up to my waistline. They’re really flattering around my stomach, which is an area of my body that I’ve been known to feel self conscious about. Plus, the relaxed fit means that it’s easy for me to wear these dungarees with a concealed pair of leggings to keep me warmer in winter! Warmth is a big outfit consideration for me, as a wheelchair user with Raynaud’s Phenomenon.

Dungarees are an can be difficult to wear when babywearing, because you have to take the sling off to be able to go to the toilet. This can be impractical if your baby is asleep or if there’s nowhere to put them down safely. With us rarely using a sling at the moment, wearing these dungarees gives me a sense of dressing for me as an individual, rather than me as a Mum. Which is important for me when using fashion as self care.

When I saw the Monsoon Blousson Sleeve Sequin Star Jumper* I thought it would be perfect combined with the dungarees. I love that the majority of the detail is on the sleeves and close to the neckline, so it doesn’t get obscured with the dungarees’ front panel. Plus, as a manual wheelchair and walking stick user, my arms are often positioned differently to my abled peers. I love the cut of the sleeves and the sequin star detail. I feel like this jumper compliments the silhouette of my body with mobility aids. Though if I were needing to use my crutches, I’d probably avoid wearing this top for fear of the crutch cuff damaging the sequins.

This jumper makes me really happy. It’s beautiful to look at and is going to be a really versatile piece in my wardrobe. I love clothing that’s easy to style and can be worn for casual and more dressed up occasions (not that I can see myself having any dressy occasions for a while!). I find that I reach for versatile pieces on days when my energy and concentration is low, as it takes little effort to put together a cohesive outfit. This is particularly important for me, as this type of day is often when I need to prioritise self care most.

I love that this would make a great Christmas jumper, as well as working well at other times of the year! I was going to pair it with the Dorothy Perkins Midwash Slim Jeans* and Converse. I’ve seen the cut off jeans/boots pairing on quite a few fashion bloggers. I thought it would be a good way for me to inject a little interest into more casual outfits. Then when I wanted to dress things up a bit, opt for a pair of heeled boots.

Unfortunately, the jeans were too big and too long for my petite frame. For reference, I’m 5ft 2.5inch and tried the regular length. I’d love to try the petite version of these jeans. I feel like they’d be a great piece for the school run, paired with Converse.

For now, I’ll be wearing this star jumper with a pair of jeggings. I’ve got a strong feeling that this will be my Christmas Day outfit. I’ll investigate the petite version at a later date.

Being high risk with COVID-19 and having had my Botox treatment postponed by 5 months, I haven’t been out much since March. When I have, we’ve kept to outdoor locations. Avoiding enclosed spaces and artificial lighting has been a necessity and will continue to be for the foreseeable future. So all my shopping is online.

I’m also having to be careful about my screen time, as this can also impact my migraine symptoms. I’ve found it hard to have so many more things take place on a screen, with my migraine deteriorating.

All of the items featured in this post have come from Very.co.uk. Shopping with companies like Very, who offer items from a range of brands, has been a really helpful way for me to have variety to choose from without having the physical strain and additional time it would take to visit three or four different stores’ websites.

As I’ve been writing this post, I’ve noticed how fashion has multiple layers of self care for me. As well as feeling more like I’m ready to tackle what life throws at me, it’s also helping me to feel more like myself. I’m choosing my outfits more mindfully, stretching my comfort zone and getting me to be more present when scrolling social media. Plus, being able to shop all in one place means I have more time and energy for other things!

How are you dressing for autumn?

Are you all about loungewear, dressing to impress the cat or a combination?